Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Seizure Number Four

My first update of the day must be to tell you all that Chloe suffered another seizure this morning at 7:04. Again, she slept and her body convulsed while asleep and she exhibited all that other jazz that goes along with her seizures.

This is getting extremely difficult for me to handle. I could really use all your prayers through this time.

No matter how many times the doctor tells me that seizures do not cause death, I always feel like my little girl is passing from this earth while she is seizing. Her lips turn blue. She sounds like she is choking for air. Her eyes roll back in her head. Her eyes dilate but she cannot see, feel or hear me. And there is absolutely nothing I can do aside from laying my hands on her back and praying.

I pray that my eyes stay focused on my Lord Jesus Christ who walks with me through this life. He loves me more than I could ever know. He loves my little Chloe more than I could ever know. I can't quite imagine what goes through His heart as he watches her convulse and seize, but I know He has a greater love for her than I can comprehend. He has our best interest at heart. As I fumble through this day, I allow my Savior to hold me in His arms and comfort me. He wants me in His arms. He wants to be my everything. He wants that precious time with me to hold me, just like I yearn for those times with Chloe.

May God be glorified through my trials, through my life. May His name be lifted high. May someone catch a glimpse of the heart of God through my time on this earth and enter into that same sweet, sweet fellowship with my wonderful God and Savior.


LadySnow said...

You know that you all are in my family's prayers.

Adron said...

Thank you for sharing.

Shannon said...

I hope things get easier on you soon. My parents had a baby that had seizures. My mom has told me about taking care of her, so I know a bit about how stressful this is on you. And no, while my sister did die, the seizures were NOT what caused her death. For her, the seizures were one of the symptoms of a much more serious issue.

I hope it will make you feel better to know that people do live with seizures and can have an otherwise normal life. Two of my closest friends in college were twins and both had epilespy. Both were on mediciation. One twin had a seizure once every 2 years. The other had a seizure about every four months. Both college students and one even was on the national honor society. Both ended up becoming teachers.

I know what you are going through is rough, but I wanted you to know that it isn't all doom and gloom. I hope you get some better answers from your doctor soon though! Good luck to both of you and to James.

Amy @ Experience Imagination said...

Sending (((hugs))) and prayers.

mbdoyle4 said...

Dear Anna, Chloe and James. thinking of you all, and praying for you.

Anonymous said...

Anna, Chloe's guardian angels are holding her while she has a seizure. This is actually so much harder for you to see than for her, as she most likely doesn't remember it.

Christine said...

I am so sorry to hear it. Praying for precious Chloe!